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Friday, 18 February 2011

Some Jokes & A Lovely Holiday To Look Forward To




I thought today I would share some daffy blonde jokes with you :

A Police Officer stops a blonde for speeding, and asks her very nicely if he could see her Licence.  She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. 

 Just yesterday you took away my Licence and now, today, you're asking me to show it to you."


There's this blonde out for a walk.  She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.  "Yoo Hoo!", she shouts.  "How can I get to the other side?"

  The second blonde looks up the river and then looks down the river and shouts back " You ARE on the other side!"


A gorgeous young redhead goes into the Doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.  "Impossible!" says the Doctor.  "Show me".

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed.  She then pushed her elbow and screamed even more.  She pushed her knee and screamed.  Likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed.  Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The Doctor looked at her and said "you're not really a redhead, are you?"  Well "no" she said. "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so" said the Doctor.  "Your finger is broken".  (That one HAS to be my favourite!).




I had a lovely long chat with my granddaughter who lives in France the other evening.  She always makes me laugh, so it was just the tonic I needed.  Anyway, she suddenly said "Grandma, I thought that next summer, we could go on holiday together, just you and I." 

 Now, how lovely is that?  The next summer she is talking about, she will be 14 and I will be 65, so imagine how delighted I was to think that she would want to come away on holiday, for a week, with little old me! Yay! 

I then asked her if there was anywhere in particular she would like to go, and she said "Italy might be nice."  Eeek, my very favourite place - my joy was unbounded! So I have said that when we next meet up, we can look at some places and see what we fancy.  (Do you think I might be able to sneak Venice in there somewhere?  Hee Hee!).

Mind you, her mum and dad think that I'm a total nutcase, so whether they will think that we should be let loose together, who knows?  (I always find it funny when I'm visiting them in France, because, you would think it would be the grandma's job to look after the granddaughter.  But, for some reason, when we're out and about,  they say things like "petite singe, ' take grandma to the toilet' ".  Excuse me??  Just because I'm in France, it doesn't mean that I can't find my way to the toilet!!).  Still, we're usually glad of any excuse to escape on our own!

Grand Singe & Petite Singe

14 comments:

Odie Langley said...

You are blessed my friend and need to lock in this opportunity & have the time of your lives. Just take plenty of pictures so we can enjoy it too. It may our only chance to see Venice.
Odie

Becky said...

Awwww.... so sweet!! I can just imagine the two of you having a wonderful time together in Italy! Can't wait to hear more about your plans! ~ loved the blonde jokes, too!! :)

Facing50Blog.com said...

That is wonderful! I took my son to Paris on my own when he was 17 and we had such fun. You will have a fabulous time and how educational it will be for her. 65 is just a number...if anyone can teach her to appreciate the beauty of Italy it'll be you. By the way do you need an interpreter? I could recommend an equally mad person who loves Italy (eek!)

Facing50Blog.com said...

Oh I forgot to add that I loved joke number three best too...I'm a blonde. It's just a bit disguised by the grey at the moment:)

lyndylou said...

aww that is so sweet :)

LindyLouMac said...

That sounds like a wonderful trip to look forward to and plan. I think Venice would be a great choice to visit with a fourteen year old. Although of course if you wanted somewhere less touristy there is always our part of the world. :)

Bouncin' Barb said...

This...You know that I'm thinking of my granddaughters and me. That is the sweetest thing. I got a call from Kali the other day and she had nothing to tell me but knowing she called just to hear me was enough to make my heart burst!! Loved this post!

Shady Del Knight said...

Good ones, Thisisme! I never heard those blonde jokes before. The one about the broken finger was a killer. Now's the time to start planning the nuts and bolts of your summer getaway because it'll be here before you know it. I hope it's a memory maker for you and your granddaughter! I hope you're feeling fine today and I wish you a lovely day over your way, dear friend!

Jumble Mash said...

Haha, funny jokes. And that's awesome about the upcoming vacation!

Belle said...

The blonde jokes were great! How wonderful your granddaughter wants to go on a trip with you! I know you will have a terrific time. I think it is hilarious her parents think you need help and are a nutcase! Families are so funny.

On My Soapbox said...

Oh, your granddaughter sounds like a wonderful young lady! Take advantage of it while you can. Italy is beautiful. I bet you will have a wonderful time, no matter where you go.

caterpillar said...

I liked the last joke the best....and it's so sweet that you and your granddaughter are planning for this trip....nice...

becca said...

these were so funny loved them and great news about vacation

Susan said...

So nice-such sweetness from a granddaughter. Good jokes too! I caught your last post and also want to say I'm glad your husband's surgery went well. And you're right-after being sick, or having some surgery, we think we can just jump up and dive right back into the fire! It's good that your spirits are up!